Lonely #Journey

karl-fredrickson-man-unsplash
Photo by Karl Fredrickson on Unsplash

This blog post is not about you.

It’s still really tough even though the divorce has been final for more than two months and we’ve been separated for almost eight months now. I know, I know, it takes times. Some people it takes a year or longer right? I’ve heard all about it. I will probably be changing my tune in a few months. Just listen.

I have an amazing family of loving parents, a great brother and sister-in-law, three awesome kids. I have some amazing friends who have stuck by me through all of this, they have called and texted, connected for dinner, and done some awesome things for me. I have some very special friends who love on me and my kids especially. They are constantly looking for new ways to bless us.

I have new friends that I had never met until after separating that have been really special and helpful. I have all of you wonderful friends who constantly encourage me and send beautiful comments and notes that I am so thankful for. My church family has been an amazing support to both me and my kids throughout all of the ups and downs.

I am so thankful. I am truly blessed.

But I am still lonely.

This is still super hard.

There is still a lot of pain.

Thank you for letting me be real here.

– Jason

19 comments

  1. Jason, This is a really great post! Thanks so much with sharing with us. Everyone heals differently and in their own time! Having gone through a blindside end of a marriage I can only tell you this – as much of a cliche as it is to say that “Time heals” – it does. I look back now at those dark days and never believed there was a better life ahead – but there was. I would never trade a moment or want to change anything in my life’s journey because if that would have happened I would not have found my Beloved Soulmate for the last twenty years.

    I’m looking forward to following you on the journey you are on and reading your poems/posts! I would really encourage you to Write and the Write more. Sit in the darkness and the silence and listen to your heart and soul and take dictation. Let yourself feel all the hurt and pain – then write it out. Let yourself remember all the love and joy and reasons you married and Write It Out! Let yourself Dream of the life and love you long for and – Write It out. I had a great Senior English assignment in High School that you may find helpful – Write an essay entitled – My Ideal Mate. This might help you focus on the future.

    My Beloved and I met on Match.com about a year and a half after my marriage ended. We corresponded for four days, met for coffee, spent 12 hours together and as they say, The rest is History! I will share with you the best four words I’ve ever written in hopes that you may want to try – when you are ready to move forward – “Stoplight Kisser, Seeking Kissee”!! I’ve always been jealous of those crazy in love teenagers at stoplights!! LOL!

    Please take it from one who has walked a similar pathway. Your writing of your experience will be a lifetime gift for you and all those who have also traveled your pathway and read your words and works! Please capture them all down.

    I’m guessing you may be able to identify with my poem – A Beautiful Scar
    https://thereluctantpoetweb.wordpress.com/2017/06/02/a-beautiful-scar/

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment! I appreciate your perspective and your encouragement. I will keep writing. It helps me to see things from a new point of view. It helps me to express myself in a different way that isn’t always possible in a counseling session or just talking with a good friend.

      That’s a cute way to “find” someone on Match.com. I haven’t ventured into those waters yet.

      Again, thank you so much for your comment, for reading, and for sharing 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. As difficult as it is, your pain reveals that you were totally invested in and ‘showed up’ in your relationship. That in and of itself speaks volumes about your character, as not everyone can, is willing or knows how to do that. Don’t worry about the ‘timelines’ that others tell you…you’ll figure it out for yourself however you were meant to and you’ll know if and when you are ready to move on. Enjoy learning about yourself as a person outside of the relationship…my many years between relationships landed me in the best possible way. Good things come in time.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Thanks for sharing your post! I agree with the many other commenters. Continue to write…your thoughts…your feelings.
    In one of my publications I read (The watchtower) It mentioned some people get divorced hoping to make their life better, while others want to remain married but cannot make their spouse stay and at the same time all who divorce find that life afterwards is harder than they expected.
    It gave some practical tips of what you can do :
    1. Grieve over what was lost
    2. Avoid isolating yourself
    3. Care for your health – Ephesians 5:29
    “For no man ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cherishes it” – so you would want to eat well, exercise and get a lot of sleep
    4. Remove things that rekindle anger towards your ex-spouse
    5.Fight negative thinking

    Liked by 1 person

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